what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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