If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
