Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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