Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
