My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Randomize
