90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
