how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
