did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
