I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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