I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Come on in and take your pants off
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