I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
