Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
