stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
