he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
