oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize