i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
