The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
We had to coat check the pizza.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
