The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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