haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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