adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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