Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
