operation harelip BJ is a go
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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