Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
