Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
