can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
We have started to decorate penises.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
