We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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