she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
