I wish i was in the wii world.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize