PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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