the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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