I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
