It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
