I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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