If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
