Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
