is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Randomize
