People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
