Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You've changed since you got that strap on
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