she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
