i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
