apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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