saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
How's work?
Spinning.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize
