He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
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