awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
