You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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