Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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