I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
