k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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