yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
