You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You left your underwear on the fireplace
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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